You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Wtf. Who made this Big Mac, Helen Keller?
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Sudden memory flashback: drunk me outside ripping my tampon out and throwing it into the neighbors yard, silently cheering 'time for sexxxx'. I sense a dangerous pattern emerging
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Randomize
