we're blogging at a bar
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
Just broke my collar bone. May not make it to the party.
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
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