no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize
