it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
nutella sex= disaster
i just got a clause named after me in the 'alcohol and drug use' section of the handbook. this is certainly a warning sign.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
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