I want to make a zoo with you.
So called my VP's house on Sunday drunk and told him that if he didn't hire me for the new position I would skull fuck his wife. They asked me to go home today. Thanks again Vodka
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
they call him Oral-B. enough said
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
So if he doesn't show up do we eat his birthday cake? Because I'm stoned and wrestling is on. What's the proper protocol
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
Randomize