For real. Like, if I ever had to choose a last meal, I would just choose to get high and eat whatever was around.
Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
I'm about to smoke a joint alone, do you want to FaceTime and pretend you're smoking it too?
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
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