belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
Holy shit I'm 26! That took an embarrassingly long time to figure it out, I need to keep buyin weed from this kid
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
Randomize
