I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
I was going through my mom's stuff to find her xanax, and I found her vibrators instead. Plural. That is like the opposite of what I wanted.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
Randomize
