I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Randomize