from now on my penis is your penis
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
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