You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
A guy at one of our big accounts just said you probably dont remember meeting me saturday night ps you were right about those two girls being lesbian
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Verdict: uncircumcised.
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