im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
you told the cab driver to stop being such a pussy because he wouldn't let you shotgun a beer in the backseat
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize