I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
No mine's bigger. It just looks smaller because I'm drunk
Doing "bucket stands" with buckets of margarita. Don't tell me it's not a good idea.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
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