Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
She used my dick as a microphone to sing "any way you want it" I'm in love.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
having sex with him is like cage fighting mixed with pilates...the condoms didn't stand a chance...
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
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