Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
You screamed "I NEED TO GET THE WHOLE SET!" and then proceeded to try touching everyone's balls in the room
Celebrating landing my dream job by watching zombie movies and drinking free booze in the bath. I'm like 90% sure I just won life.
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
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