I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
Woke up this morning 8 levels higher in Call of Duty then when I started drinking... told you I was better when I was drunk.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
My parents called me out on catching us walking home from the bar in a swimming motion because "it was too windy to walk" home...
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
