I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
But life isn't just all about getting drunk & eating chicken strips.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
Randomize