Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
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