therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
Just saw some guy walking down the street rapping about various types of pasta.
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
The night took a downhill turn when he started using a butter knife as a spoon to drink his cosmo
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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