The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Randomize
