I feel like I'm in dance class right now
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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