eh.. i should've known it was headed downhill after he used the phrase "pussy sundae"
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
I am lonely and hungry. I need a girlfriend, but I'd settle for my mom.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
