Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
Randomize
