i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
Little spoons don't ask big questions
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
it is 7:54 and i am surrounded by drunk old people. drunk enough that my grandmother and her friend just compared boobs. as in, shirts off, bras coming down. save me.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
He kept yelling "osteoporosis" and threw milk at her because she broke her arm.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
