I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
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She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated