return my video game
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize