she woke up with a sticky ear
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
Randomize
