I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
Might be time to reevaluate my life. Banned from red roofs inns. Apparently I puked in ice machine. 3 hotels in a year.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
I immediately woke up from my nap, made myself a screwdriver and got in the shower. I know it's spring break but I'm still questioning my life choices.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
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