um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
So I'm going to regale you with a tale of someone who went out, was fed way to many shots, got super wasted and now has a date with one of the security guards from the building but has no idea what his name is. That someone is me
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Randomize