Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (916): View more from California

  I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (916): I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night http://tfl.nu/fggv
  Replies (33) Good night (1451) Bad night (5035)
• Favorite

  (314): View more from Missouri

  No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (314): No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone. http://tfl.nu/hhkp
  Replies (9) Good night (4115) Bad night (956)
• Favorite

  (339): View more from Massachusetts

  I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (339): I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette http://tfl.nu/67ko
  Replies (22) Good night (6125) Bad night (1671)
• Favorite

  (650): View more from California

  Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (650): Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart. http://tfl.nu/8dw8
  Replies (18) Good night (5490) Bad night (1425)
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (914): does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up? http://tfl.nu/cmpo
  Replies (30) Good night (3043) Bad night (3667)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (402): We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR? http://tfl.nu/06jo
  Replies (1) Good night (1039) Bad night (664)
• Favorite

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (724): Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter http://tfl.nu/v115
  Replies (2) Good night (1539) Bad night (574)
• Favorite

  (623): View more from Arizona

  Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (623): Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that. http://tfl.nu/xmai
  Replies (10) Good night (988) Bad night (697)
• Favorite

  (860): View more from Connecticut

  Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (860): Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now. http://tfl.nu/0rnz
  Replies (4) Good night (2905) Bad night (705)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (570): it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing. http://tfl.nu/57qo
  Replies (4) Good night (989) Bad night (529)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive

  (1-303): View more from Colorado

  Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive (1-303): Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose http://tfl.nu/eyzf
  Replies (6) Good night (975) Bad night (650)
• Favorite

  (303): View more from Colorado

  He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (303): He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled. http://tfl.nu/tlei
  Replies (2) Good night (483) Bad night (693)
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (610): I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker. http://tfl.nu/5fnr
  Replies (1) Good night (992) Bad night (403)
• Favorite

  (281): View more from Texas

  Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (281): Is it weird to wish your favorite hooker "happy thanksgiving"? http://tfl.nu/b1oc
  Replies (4) Good night (309) Bad night (335)
• Favorite

  (312): View more from Illinois

  Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (312): Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again http://tfl.nu/we6a
  Replies (0) Good night (262) Bad night (227)

Randomize