I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
Randomize
