I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
Randomize
