He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
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