There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
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