so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
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