She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
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