I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have you ever straight up just taken a bite out of a block of cheese? Because it's amazing.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
Dude, putting on underwear straight out of the dryer is the greatest thing ever. It feels like I wrapped my vagina in a warm blanket.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize