walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
I love it when strippers help me get other strippers numbers.
Randomize
