sitting in my room eating a boneless rib tv dinner, and listening to taylor swift's love story, and i sharted. had to finish the ribs and hear the end of the song before i went to the bathroom to wipe.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
She has more profile pics than tagged pics. narcissism at its best.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
How is it that I've hooked up with not one but two guys in the children's section of a bookstore tonight?
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
all my money is vodka money
I have never read a truer sentence.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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