well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
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