he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
Randomize