you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
I have a huge gash on my chin. Did I get it from A) a mini siezure; B) an oral sex incident; C) Slamming it into a ledge or; D) all of the above?
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
yeah that bottle of rum is only the second thing I want that kid to be pulling out of his pants
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
