I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
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