ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
Randomize
