Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
We have so much sex to catch up on
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
He was actually surprised when I poured myself a glass full of straight vodka. Clearly he doesn't know me as well as he thinks.
I'm reading fall out boy fanfic. What has my life come to.
Randomize