I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
I need a Xanax. A Veggie Delight. And exhibition style sex.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
My Easter dress smells like alcohol, men, and bad decisions
Girl... I just woke up with a bloody mary in a to go cup on my nightstand and two hours late for work.. I'm sorry i can't go out on weekdays anymore. Luckily my boss was just happy i was ok
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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