dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Randomize