so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
She bit a glass in half.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
