Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
I'm not even pretending to study anymore. I'm straight up sleeping in the library
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Randomize