Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
She called me Spock and proceeded to ask me to 'teach her the ways of the force'. I just couldn't do it after that. No way am I fucking a girl who can't tell the difference between Star Wars and Star Trek.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
My feet surprised me
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
Randomize
