you really should stop posting my phone number on craigslist as tranny seeking tranny, last night i answered at family dinner and almost choked on my hot dog
do you not see the irony in that??
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
and let me tell you something, handcuffs are surprisingly uncomfortable when they arent being used in a sexual manner
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
